Lester Link

2006-11-21T09:29:00.000-08:00

Kelly Anne Plummer Lester was born on January 30 th 1975. She grew up in the Briar Village Subdivision in West Houston. She attended St Agnes Catholic High School. She also attended Texas Tech University and the University of Houston. Kelly and I were married October 26, 2002.

One year ago tomorrow Kelly was diagnosed with a rare form of Liver cancer. In the last year she endured 16 rounds of chemotherapy, two unsuccessful surgeries to remove the cancer and numerous other procedures. On November 3, 2006 kelly and I went to MD Anderson for physical therapy later that evening Kelly told her family and I that she did not want to fight this battle anymore. The doctors seem to think Kelly gave in mentally to the disease only hours before her body did. She passed away 12 days later. That is how Kelly’s life ended.

But today is about something different; today is about how Kelly lived. Kelly had an enthusiasm for life that I have seen in no other. Her zeal for life cannot be summed up in words, but I will have to try. She was passionate about life, her family and friends. She lived with no regrets and believed that things should be done all or nothing. The same way she battled cancer. Her smile was radiant and her laugh contiguous. She was known for her wit and truthfulness. And all of us who knew Kelly know that sometimes to much wit and to much truthfulness, where not necessarily a good thing, but with my wife you always knew where you stood. One of the few people I know who could tell you where wrong and that she loved you in the same sentence and mean it. Kelly loved all or nothing. She loved her family and friends; she was always thinking of things that she could do for them to make their lives easier and how she could help them in any way.

Anybody who has ever been in a car with Kelly is probably surprised that cancer is what ended up taking her life. Often on the way to MD Anderson for an appointment or treatment I would joke with her “ I don’t know why we are worried cancer your going to kill us both.” As my best friends wife said, “ there is one thing you can tell about a women is that she lives her life like she drives” well then Kelly was all gas and no brakes. She told her girlfriends days before her passing that it “has been a good ride” and indeed it has.

As short as a time as Kelly and I had she made sure that our time together was well spent. She made sure that we lived. We traveled to Russia, Europe, Cape Cod, and many other destinations, we moved 3 times, we acquired 2 beautiful labs that Kelly adored, only one of which was purchased with my permission. I fill blessed to have experienced the years that I had with her. I thank god that he gave me that time.

I know so many of us will miss these wonderful things about Kelly, but as we grieve let us remember the way that Kelly lived. As cliché as it sounds Kelly would want us to go on with lives. Because that is what Kelly told me she wanted. And those of us who know her well, know what happens when you go against Kelly’s wishes. So let us not morn for Kelly today ,but celebrate her life. For Kelly is not in pain today she is with our lord and we all have a new angel in our lives. Death terminates life but it does not terminate the spirit in which a person lived. So today sometimes I want everyone who knew Kelly to close there eyes and think about the last time with her or your favorite time with her and there is no doubt in my mind that you remember the spirit of which Kelly lived. Take that moment and carry it with you always as a way to remember this beautiful woman forever and forever.

2006-11-16T13:46:00.000-08:00

Kelly's Arrangements:

Visitation: Sunday November 19, 2006 from 4 tp 6 p.m.

Earthman Funeral Homes
Hunters Creek Chapel
8303 Katy Freeway
Houston, TX 77024
P 713 465 8900

www.earthmanfunerals.com

Service: Monday November 20, 2006 11:00 a.m.

St. John Vianney Catholic Church
625 Nottingham Oaks Trail
Houston, TX 77079

www.stjohnvianney.org

2006-11-16T07:02:00.000-08:00

Kelly passed away last night around 7:00 p.m., I was with her. I will post the arrangements when they are made.

The doctor's thoughts are that she fought this disease within about an hour of her body shutting down.

What a wonderful life we have all had the pleasure of experiencing. What a wonderful women she was.

Joel

2006-11-09T20:48:00.000-08:00

Kelly told me last Friday night that she couldn't fight anymore. She was ready to give up and she was at peace with God and her decision. The pain became unbearable and we had to go to the ER. Saturday morning the doctor confirmed what Kelly already knew.

We are home now and have begun home hospice care. We don't know how much longer we have but what I do know is that I am blessed to have the strongest, most courageous wife and that we are in this together.

Thank you for your continued care and concern. Although every e-mail, call, and text message may not be returned, they are received and very much appreciated.

Please keep us in you thoughts and prayers,

Kelly & Joel

2006-11-02T13:00:00.000-08:00

Kelly is OK, but has had a rough three weeks.

On October the 17th Kelly received her new chemo treatment. The infusion was extremely long and we did not leave MD Anderson till 3:00 a.m. that night. Most of the following day we rested ,but that evening Kelly became very disoriented, confused and weak. Thursday morning October 19th we went to the ER due to these symptoms. They ran test. When the test came back Kelly's sodium was extremely low causing the confusion and fatigue, basically she was suffering from dehydration. The chemo just zapped what strength she had left. The more pressing matter was that her kidneys were not functioning properly, acute kidney failure, in medical terms. The first few days in the hospital where the worst. I call them " wait and see " days. They began to give her fluids and slowly but surely she regained her mental bearings and her kidneys began to function at a more normal level. We left the hospital on October 27th.

Kelly is resting at home ,but is still very fatigued. We will begin physical therapy tomorrow to regain strength in her legs and arms from the dehydration and hospital stay. I can not thank everyone enough for the all the calls, emails and kind things people have done while we where in the hospital. Thanks to everyone who helped around the house and pulled "dog duty".

I am married to a very strong women who continues to fight everyday. Please continue with your support and prayers.

Joel

2006-10-12T16:33:00.000-07:00

Tuesday, we had a CAT Scan to check the chemo's progress and no surprise to anyone, it is not working. Today, we met with him to discuss the results of the CAT. The tumor has actually grown since I started this new therapy. He wants to try a different combination therapy with more targeted chemo which will focus on zapping some of the specific characteristics of my tumor, he is deciding between 2 options. I will find out what he has decided on Monday and hopefully start the new drugs Monday morning. We are not too bummed, we had already been given the heads up as a result of how terrible I was feeling and the blood counts. I am happy to start something new that works and does its job. Hopefully, the one that works is the one that is covered by my insurance! :)

For now, I have an appetite and I am holding down a good amount of food. I know things are looking up and I will send this cancer crap a packing!

2006-10-06T16:58:00.000-07:00

We skipped chemo last session b/c I was feeling too poorly. I received a blood transfusion and a 3 day infusion of Magnesium to try and help me feel better. That worked for a few days, but I was down again pretty bad yesterday, so we decided it would be best to hold off again. Something is obviously not working. My tumor markers are elevated so he wants me to get a CAT Scan to see what's going on. We may have to tinker with my meds to get them working properly. Which possibly means changing out a couple of the meds or possibly going back to my original treatment that worked very well for me in the beginning. Not such great news, we will get the test results from the scan on Thursday and we will hopefully have a plan of attack by then. I feel a lot better today than I did yesterday, I think I just needed a short break, 2 weeks isn't that big of a deal. I need to try and get my appetite back to normal to increase my energy level and so forth. I also did a round of steroids, starting Sunday and I believe that has helped directly with my appetite. The blogging has been slow, I apologize, I will try and keep up better. I need some well wishes and happy thoughts right now while I try and turn this thing around and get a better grip on it. I appreciate everyone's' continued support, it means the world to me!

Love,
Kelly

2006-09-27T19:32:00.000-07:00

Sorry it's been a while since I last posted. Not much fun stuff to report. I have been extremely sick to my stomach and unable to eat anything. I am feeling better today, just in time for chemo tomorrow, yippee! I have a blood draw at 7:30, Dr. Appt. at 9:30 and chemo at 11:30, if everything stays somewhat on schedule we should be off the island around 6ish tomorrow. I am ready to kick some cancer booty tomorrow, it has kept me down in the dumps for too long now and my patience has run short, I am ready to fight back and take control of these ridiculous side effects! Wish me luck!

2006-09-21T17:00:00.000-07:00

Today I ate 1/2 of a can of chicken soup and it seems to be staying down okay. I ate it over the span of an hour, from 4-5. But I am not feeling queasy, so I hope it stays down all night. I had some tumor pain pop up over the last few days, but that has subsided, which is good. So, today was a pretty okay day overall. Lots of TV to watch tonight, so I gotta run! Thanks for the kind and supportive emails and comments, they mean so much to me. Every time a comment is posted to my blog, it sends an email to me quoting the comment, so I don't have to go and check the comments on the blog. I get each and every one via email, I love them all! Thanks!

2006-09-18T20:24:00.000-07:00

This one has been pretty rough. The only thing I can hold down is saltine crackers, I have thrown up EVERYTHING I have tried to eat since chemo and the anti-nausea meds don't seem to be working either. I got through the flu part okay, just a couple of break through high fevers. I am just going to stick to the crackers for now and stop venturing out to try new things. Sorry I don't have much else to post, it has been kind of a rough last few days. I do feel okay as long as I don't eat, which isn't recommended with the amount of drugs I am taking. I'll check back in a couple of days and I will hopefully have better news.

Happy Birthday to my wonderful Mom! She is another year younger today. Keep her in your thoughts as she is not feeling too well these days either, including today on her birthday, which is pretty crummy. Love ya Mom!

2006-09-14T18:34:00.000-07:00

Chemo was a success today, I didn't sleep quite as much as usual, so I am pretty worn out now. Luckily, we were assigned to the ACB building with the brand new fancy chemo suites, so we were very happy about that. We arrived around 8 and left around 4, so not too bad of a day on the island. I hope the weekend flu symptoms that result from this new chemo take it easy on me and go away real fast. I think we got the regimen down last time, if we begin taking Tylenol and Motrin every 8 hours, beginning the first day after chemo, we pretty much prevent all the symptoms from occurring in the first place. We'll see how it goes!

2006-09-11T16:40:00.000-07:00

I have been doing fairly well these days. I have zero appetite, I am doing good if I hold down an entire bagel in one day. Cereal seams to be somewhat agreeable too. So, of course, along with no appetite comes no energy. I am still on a steady dose of painkillers, so it is extremely difficult to fight the drowsiness that they cause. I am also taking anti-nausea pills pretty regularly and those knock me out completely. I am definitely back to my old narcoleptic self, I can fall asleep anywhere these days, which limits my driving just a tad. For the most part, my pain is under control and I don't feel completely worthless every day. If I could just get this vomiting and nausea to go away, I think everything else would fall into place again.

Dr. appointment, blood draw and chemo are set for Thursday, nothing else exciting on the books.

2006-09-06T18:21:00.000-07:00

We finally got our floors fixed up in the study and I am able to blog again with ease. I have had several consecutive good days lately, it is so nice to feel like a human again. Today I actually held down a good portion of food and my Dad and I went to the hospital to visit my Mom, she has been in for a couple of days fighting some yucky virus. So, please keep her in your thoughts until she gets better and is released back home. Of all places to be on my big excursion day, the hospital! But it was nice to spend some quality time with the parental units, believe it or not? :)

Please try to cut down on the harassment of my husband on days I do not blog, there is just not much to report EVERY single day of my boring life. I promise, the big stuff makes it on here in some shape or form. He needs a break from this stuff too.

Much Love,
Kelly

2006-09-01T11:42:00.000-07:00

We had Chemo yesterday and everything went fine. We are having some work done at the house so the computer room is currently " under construction ". I am blogging from work, but Kelly will be back up and blogging soon.

Joel

2006-08-26T21:23:00.000-07:00

This past week was kind of bumpy. I had a couple of okay days in there, but mostly not so good days. I have had a lot of nausea issues and lots of vomiting, fun stuff! I had to cancel chemo on Friday b/c I was so sick at my stomach I could barely get out of bed. I hated having to do that, I would never have thought I would actually have to cancel a chemo appointment. Oh well, it was necessary, I would never have made it through 6 hours of chemo. I hope to get it rescheduled early this week, but who knows with those folks working down on the island, they have been pretty worthless lately! I think I finally shook whatever had a grip on me around 6 Friday evening, I was so wiped out! I had a good night's sleep and I have had a pretty good day today, my stomach has behaved fairly well for me. I wish I had better news to report, but it is what it is, blah! I will post when I get my next chemo date.

2006-08-20T17:33:00.000-07:00

I have had quite a few crummy days lately. Fevers, nausea, vomiting, you name it, it struck at some point in the last week! Hopefully, I have put all of that behind me and I am destined for some better days.

I had a great day today! Joel and I actually left the house and saw a movie and went to an actual restaurant, sat down and ate a meal! I didn't have any issues, I am pretty wiped out and it's ready for drug time. But I am glad to report that all went well and we really enjoyed our escape from the sick-house for the day! I hope to catch up on days like today, it has been way too long since we went somewhere and enjoyed ourselves.

Tomorrow, we have a doc appointment on the island to get the all clear for chemo on Friday. I hate having the infusions so close together, oh well!

2006-08-13T07:48:00.000-07:00

Sorry this blog took so long to post, I was having blogger issues. So this is truly Sunday's blog.

Chemo #2, went well. No drama, which is always good. I had a little bit of an appetite on our way home from the island, so we grabbed some PF Chang's to go and I had a chicken lettuce wrap, yummy! I also had one yesterday as my meal for the day. That's a lot of food for 2 days for me, Joel was very proud of me.

At about 7ish this morning, I started to have those crazy flu-like symptoms that are typical to the new type of chemo I am on. I was shaking and chattering freezing under a ton of blankets, my fever was low 100's, but I managed to shake that in a couple of hours. I hope that is not what my day is going to be like, I will shoot for no and see what happens! I hope everyone has a good Sunday, try and keep cool!

2006-08-10T19:53:00.000-07:00

I did have a good day today, a little nausea due to some weird smells. But other than that, I did pretty good. I had a Boost at 4 AM and I actually got hungry later in the evening and I had a chicken breast around 7ish. I hope it stays happy all evening and doesn't haunt me later! Tomorrow is chemo #2 at 1:00, I hope all goes well. Suzanne will be up there later in the afternoon to visit with her Dad during his chemo, so maybe our paths will cross at some time on the island? I am very sleepy right now, so I am headed off to bed.

2006-08-10T04:53:00.000-07:00

Somebody over-did it yesterday and got off the pain med schedule and hit a wall around 3. I felt so sick and had a fever and of course, I was supposed to meet up with the girls. I had to cancel, now since the pain med screw up, my sleep schedule is screwed up too. I have been awake since 4, so I figured I would get a blog under my belt while I still had time. I hope to feel somewhat human today to meet up with Suz and ET to do girly stuff, I am so bummed I missed out on seeing everyone last night. But I guess I needed to lay low b/c I slept the entire time and I do feel caught up and rested this morning. We are going to have to resort to the alarm thing if I can't stay on top of my meds on my own. I am sure I have several volunteers out there who would love the chance to call and nag me during my slumber!! Chat with ya later when I am awake between anti-nausea pills. We finally remembered why we didn't use Kytril that often last time b/c it is 20 bucks for 6 pills, Kytril is the only one I am not allergic to that does not make me drowsy! Just my luck, I'll find something, I just need to look harder.

2006-08-07T14:20:00.000-07:00

This weekend the nausea decided to kick in and we have been playing that fun game, it's not like I have been eating enough anyway. Now, every little bit wants to run away! Met with the doc today and my blood counts are doing better, I am still a little anemic and my magnesium is low, so I will treat that before chemo this Friday. I started feeling better yesterday evening and today on the island. I hope this feeling good hangs around, my friends Evangelina and Suzanne are coming in town this week and I hope to make my first social outing in months. There are several days a week that I don't even have enough energy to make a trip downstairs, I haven't been eating, so why bother? Thanks for everyone keeping up with me, it really means a lot. I am off to take a nap from my big outing today. It's thundering and lightning, perfect sleepy-time weather.

2006-08-03T19:37:00.000-07:00

The last few days were spent playing catch up on the typical flu-like symptoms I was supposed to be experiencing. I basically threw back 2 Tylenol and 2 Motrin every 12 hours and the pain meds mixed in there too. Today around 10:30 I woke up suddenly feeling terrible. I was sweating and on fire. I immediately took my temp of a whopping 103.4!! I freaked out. We finally had our prescriptions corrected the day before and filled the Naprosyn/Naproxen? they conveniently forgot to give me on my prior visit. So, I was finally able to take the drug recommended for me to cure these breakthrough "tumor fevers". I took the Naprosyn/Naproxen? and some Oxycontin and Dillaudid, which all worked within minutes. I really had a scare there, I have just recently been dabbling in the 102's for the first time in my life and there I was with a 103.4 fever! I am just very happy I had what I needed to fix my current issues. I have been feeling pretty good ever since. I tried to stay awake most of the afternoon, I think I only napped for 1 hour. I had to stay up so Joel and I could watch Big Brother 7 together, it's no fun watching it by yourself on DVR. So now I will be nice and sleepy to get to bed on time.

Thanks so much to all my wonderful friends for bringing us food to keep Joel fed with nice home cooked meals lately! I have the best group of friends and family in the world and I will forever be in debt to your kindness! I have been so out of it, I think it has been a month already of food delivery service? It's been such a great help.

Love,
Kelly

2006-08-01T18:00:00.000-07:00

We have had some wonderfully scary nights here lately. I had a huge fever spike to 102.9 and I kind of freaked out a little. I absolutely did not want to go through the Emergency "Center" as they like to call it, experience once again.

One of my super duper best friends has a brother in law that is a wonderful oncologist up at the Mayo Clinic and he specializes in colon cancer and I believe he sees a few cholangio patients these days. Anyway, Sara got me in touch with him and he called me himself around 8 in the evening from Rochester to help me out. I don't know if there are enough "thank you's" out there to express how much he helped me. I felt so guilty for bothering him during his down time with his family, but he was more than happy to help me out. He changed up some meds I was taking and gave me a couple of new ones and within a couple of hours, I was back on track. That night was horrible, but would have been 5 times as bad if I was on a stretcher in an ER hallway! The phone call and the med change happened Sunday night and I didn't get out of bed all day or night the following Monday. Today, I felt much better, I have been able to let up on the pain meds and the spike fevers have stayed under control. I actually woke up and moved around about noon and I ate a couple of bites of food! I had to take a 2 hour nap a while ago, but I am still doing okay. Axel, my Angel Doctor told me to expect the severe flu like symptoms for a couple of days. I do feel like I am on course. I am still very groggy, but sleep is good, nobody gets enough, right?

2006-07-29T12:27:00.000-07:00

Our midnight post is indicative of our return home from the chemo party. We heard they had a great happy hour on the 10th floor, so we had to go check it out, we got kicked out b/c we had been there since 3ish. I guess there were others in need of chemo too?

Chemo went pretty smoothly, besides the fact we almost didn't get in b/c when they took my vitals, I had 102.4 fever!! 101.5 is the go to the Emergency Room("Center") rule. That is crazy high for me, I think the highest I have had so far is 101.8? We were so bummed and begged to be let in. The nurse paged my doc and he said go ahead, he thought it was just tumor fever, YEAH!!!!! I hardly got any sleep b/c all the anxiety, finally they fed me some Phenergan for my nausea and I crashed for a while. This chemo regimen will be administered every 2 weeks, with no "off" week in between. My pain has let up an incredible amount today. I am meeting with the pain management team next week to try and figure it out once and for all. I may go on the fentanyl(sp) patch, which feeds you a constant dose of pain meds throughout the day and night. I am hoping that once I get a few chemo days under my belt, my pain will disappear like last time. I hate to write these specific hopeful things on my blog b/c I almost always jinx myself!

Thanks for all of you keeping up with me when I was not holding up my end of the bargain. I have truly never been so down in the dumps for so long consecutively in my life and I NEVER want to go there again! I hope to start getting out of the house more and for the record, I ate 1 & 1/2 of a chicken tender last night and 1 graham cracker! Joel was so proud of me, he has been freaking out b/c I won't eat. I lost 30 pounds since April and it was still dropping before my last stay in the hospital. While in the hospital, they decided to pump me full of fluids and saline and I gained 20 pounds in 7 days!! That has been so uncomfortable for me b/c it's all fluid and I am very swollen, YUCK! The doc prescribed me a diuretic for it b/c he thought that was an excessive amount too.

I hope you have enjoyed the long recap, you know I am bad off if I can't even keep up with my blogging! :)

2006-07-28T21:47:00.000-07:00

Alright, alright alright!!! Just got home from chemo #1 on the new cocktail. I am falling asleep as I type. Details later, I can feel the chemo working

2006-07-26T17:13:00.000-07:00

Still re-couping in bed. All of these meds are hilarious, the junk that runs through my head everyday is unbelievable. I keep waking myself up by either talking to myself or an imaginary someone else in my sleep. The other night I woke Joel up from a deep sleep b/c I had reached over and smacked him hard across the chest. I told him to get over it b/c in my dream he deserved it! :)

Overall, I truly am feeling better. If I could just stay awake, during the course of typing this email, I have fallen asleep around 8-10 times. Don't worry, I am still not out on the streets yet, YET!

2006-07-25T19:42:00.000-07:00

My poor bed was very neglected too, not being slept in for 7 days. So, I made sure I caught up on beauty sleep all day today. Then the rain started, what a wonderful nap day I had today. I am still tired, I kept falling asleep taking my evening doses of all my meds. Joel was cracking up at me, he kept looking over at me and I was out cold sitting straight up, completely overwhelmed with the number of pills I had to ingest. So, after my supervised pill taking, I am now off to bed and I am only lacking a couple of "bedtime" doses. I have started taking Lunesta now and I like it better than the Ambien, at least I haven't had to crawl back and forth to bed in the middle of the night after a trip to the bathroom! This blog is just a plethora of information for you guys, huh? Sometimes you are just going to get more info than you bargained for, sorry!

2006-07-24T19:32:00.000-07:00

We finally got home today around 6. I am wiped out. It is so WONDERFUL to be home, I cannot begin to tell you! My pups, my cat, my pillow, my bed, peace and quiet!!!

Tomorrow, we are going to go buy one of those senile plastic drug dispensers, I can't believe how many drugs they have sent me home with! Thanks for all of the support, details later if I feel up to it. I may just put this one behind me and forget it ever happened! I have never had to stay in the hospital for so long and I think the next time someone tries to send me, there will be lots of kicking and screaming.

2006-07-21T13:26:00.000-07:00

Kelly is still in the hospital ,but doing much better. The main focus of the stay has been to eliminate any infection and getting her pain under control. Kelly has been in quite a bit of pain since the surgery and has needed some relief. While the hospital is no fun (especially for 6 days), hopefully we have accomplished some things that will make her start to feel like a real person. The last month has been hard on her.

The doc wants to watch her for another 24 to 48 hours to make sure we have the right combination of drugs before she will get to come home.

Thank you once again for all the great support we have out there. I'll let Kelly fill you in on the rest.

Joel

Guest Blogger: Kelley Stephens

2006-07-19T07:28:00.000-07:00

Kelly asked that I post an update. She was supposed to begin chemo Monday, but was sent to the ER from her doctor’s appointment. They believe she has a blood infection of some kind. So…she’s now been admitted into the hospital and is awaiting word on the blood culture (which they say takes 48 hours). Stay tuned for more updates.

Please keep up the good thoughts and prayers.

2006-07-16T16:09:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is my first day on the new chemo regimen. I have a blood draw at 11:30, Dr. Appt. at 1:30 and chemo at 3:00. I haven't been able to find all the details about this new chemo and how long it will last, but both the Gemzar and the Cisplatin can be administered simultaneously, so I don't have to wait around to do one at a time. I hope they get all my meds right and that I get the fancy new building again tomorrow, I am really going to have to turn on the tears if they try and stick me in the old chemo rooms! I hope that the chemo shuts off this pain like it did last time, I am sick and tired of being sick and tired! Wish me luck tomorrow, I hope I am well enough to report only good news when I get home, it may be too late, so details may have to follow on Tuesday. I am off to take another nap so I can wake up in time to watch Big Brother!!

2006-07-13T19:03:00.000-07:00

I am glad to report today was a good "no pain" day. I did spend most of the day in bed, sitting up or lying down, but I was pain free, which was great! I actually got up and took a shower and Joel and I left the house to run an errand. I finally got to drive for the first time in 4 weeks, it was only a couple of miles, but it was very nice to be behind the wheel again. I am very much the city driver and Joel is the epitome of the country driver, so we usually have issues when we are in the car together. I was glad to have the reigns back. On our outing, we stopped at Black Eyed Pea for some comfort food and I was able to eat 1/2 a roll and a few bites of mac & cheese, seemed to go down okay, I hope it stays there! I am off to bed soon, I had a big day today and I am banking on more consecutive pain free days!

Thanks for all of the kind and encouraging emails and comments, trust me, they are helping!
Love,
Kelly

2006-07-11T19:50:00.000-07:00

Last weekend was so-so, more so bad than so good, but oh well. Monday, I went in for another Procrit shot, I think they are starting to help out a little. I had an okay day today, we got new pain killers that seem to have less side effects on me. I have so many drugs on my list and I can't stomach them all, especially since I am not eating anything. Turns out the "CR" in the new Ambien CR stands for Crack Rock! That stuff makes me crazy high and hallucinate, I had to slide against the hall to get to the bathroom when I woke up in the middle of the night, I ended up crawling back to bed. So, I cannot refill the regular Ambien b/c of the timing of the filling of the CR, so I tried Valium, which seemed to be working for a few days, but my doc is worried about it being addictive. So, last night I tried a Lunesta, hate those commercials, and it did nothing for me! At least the new painkillers don't make me sweat like a crazy person and I am able to manage some sleep at night. I have to write down every dose of every pill I take and each day fills up a page in my notebook, the new painkiller is every 3-4 hours, so that's a lot of pills each day with just that one drug. Sorry, I have been a slow blogger, but over the last few days, I have not left my bedroom to come downstairs for anything. The pain is manageable, but the loopiness of the drugs and the no appetite are keeping me down, plus all the anemia stuff doesn't help. Today the doc told Joel to get my pain under control and take the painkillers as soon as I need them, regardless of the time. Once we can get my pain under control, then my energy will build back up along with my appetite and everything should fall back into place. It worked today, so we are going to stick with that plan and see how it goes. My incision is healing nicely, it's just my innards that are bothering me.

2006-07-06T18:08:00.000-07:00

Today was a little better. Joel and I found a good drug combo that helped me sleep last night. I actually got 5 consecutive hours of sleep, I felt like a new person today! Of course I was wide awake at 5:00 this morning, I napped later in the day but I still feel a lot better after getting almost a full night's sleep. Hopefully, the drug combo will work for me again tonight.

2006-07-04T15:51:00.000-07:00

Sorry, I have been slacking on my blog, I have really been miserable lately and barely coherent between all the drugs I am on. Joel has been a Saint through all of this, I am no fun to be around when I feel this lousy, trust me!

Thursday night was no bueno either. I had a horrible day on Friday and Joel and I went in to the ER Friday evening around 5:30, along with all of the other cancer patients in the greater Houston area! It was packed, Joel and I were huddled up on one of the couches in the hall and we finally got called back at around 8ish. There were no rooms, so I was literally in a bed in the middle of the hall along with about 5 other hall-dwellers! It was ridiculously loud and bright, I was more comfortable on the couch in the waiting room. After an EKG, several x-rays and a CAT scan, they couldn't find anything wrong with me. My hemoglobin was already up to 9.9, which is very good for the road to chemo. They saw pockets of fluid on the CT, but they were consistent with the surgery I didn't have. So, they pumped me full of pain meds, some IV fluids and antibiotics and sent me home with an antibiotic. We didn't leave the ER until 7:30 Saturday morning, it was sooo much fun!

Since we have been home, I have just been sleeping like crazy and having random hours here and there of lucidity. The pain was intolerable for a few days there and just moving from the bed to the bathroom was a chore. Yesterday, I got up around mid afternoon and Joel and I went couch shopping for a few hours. Good thing about furniture shopping is that you can stop and take a break every 5 feet if you need to, there is always something comfy to sit on! Last night, I finally got the nerve to roll onto the side of my liver and half my scar to try and sleep. It used to be my only sleeping position, it went well and I got more sleep than I have in a long time. I didn't get up and going until 3ish this afternoon. My nights are spent sweating and tossing and turning and usually around 8 in the morning I am able to move past it and fall asleep. It is a very weird schedule, but oh well! It's not like I am missing much around here with all of this rain, our back yard is a lake again and the dogs are not too happy with us!

I hope everyone has a good 4th of July celebration!

2006-06-29T15:05:00.000-07:00

Well, I recovered nicely from the previous night just in time to replay it over again last night. I am journaling all my meds, food intake, fevers, and other fun stuff and I literally got a fever again last night at the exact same time as last night and it was the exact same temp! Too weird! So, I was up all night again, woke up at 10 feeling crummy, went back to sleep and woke up at 3PM soaked in sweat and in some serious pain. Maybe I have a little bug or something that is making me miserable while still trying to get over the big task at hand. Whatever it is, I wish it would go away, it is no fun!

2006-06-28T16:17:00.000-07:00

I am recovering from a pretty rough night last night. I tried to go to sleep around 10ish and I don't think I fell asleep until 3ish, after downing an Ambien! I had a pretty good fever working when I went to bed and it took me several hours to break it and sweat it out. I cannot get comfortable to sleep while I am sweating and burning up, so I just tossed and turned and kept cold washrags on my head until the darn thing went away. The Ambien kept me out until well into the afternoon. But since I got going late in the day, I have felt okay. The pain seems to be on its way out, I hope. It does wake me up like clockwork when my next Oxycontin dose is due, so I guess I am not completely free of the drugs yet. The fevers have been sporadic for quite a while now, and less intense, so I was surprised to see one that high, I hope it stays away.

2006-06-26T15:31:00.000-07:00

The doctor's visit went okay today. Our appointment was for 7:45 and we didn't leave until after 11:00. So, that was kind of a drag. The doc was very upbeat and he is going to put me on a different chemo cocktail that is pretty popular and supposedly has less side effects. The new drugs are Gemzar(Gemcitabine) and Cisplatin. They will both be given via infusion as opposed to the Xeloda I was on before that was given in a pill form. They are concerned about my Hemoglobin b/c it is at 8.8 and it has dropped from 12.6 in the last month and a half. My physician's asst. thinks it is most likely from all the surgeries I have had in the same time frame. They are putting me on Procrit, I got a shot of it today and I will follow with one shot weekly until my levels rise. I need to do this by July 17th, b/c I will not be allowed to undergo chemo with my numbers so low. So, my first chemo on the new regimen is set for July 17th and these drugs will be administered every 2 weeks, instead of every 3 with my prior cocktail.

Since the "tiny" tumors they found on my abdominal wall took me out of the running as a surgical candidate, I now have to fight this disease systemically again and slow down its progression. The doc says that no stats out there regarding cholangio apply to me b/c of my age and anything is possible with all of the new technology just around the corner. There was mention of radiation, MDACC has a new cutting edge Proton something radiation that is about to take off and will be more precise than any other radiation out there. And there was mention of Erbitux and Tarceva, which are tablet form pills that work if your tumors are releasing a certain type of protein, so he is going to send of some of my frozen tissue slides to see if those drugs may be available as a combination therapy with the other chemo drugs. Basically, I am fighting this thing as a chronic disease and hopefully I can stay within the acceptable range at all times as not to delay any chemo doses and as advancements come along, I am in the best place to take advantage of them.

2006-06-25T18:35:00.000-07:00

This weekend was extremely uneventful! The only way I can get comfortable is by lying flat on my back. Which I find very hard to stay awake while tucked cozily in my bed. The pain meds are now about 5-6 hours apart, when I first started them, I was about every 3-4 hours, so I am making some progress there.

Tomorrow we finally have our appointment with the oncologist to figure out how we are going to tackle this junk. I would like to start chemo right away, but I may have to hold off for a while so my giant incision can heal. We'll see. I will post the new info tomorrow.

Happy Birthday Suzanne!

2006-06-23T16:20:00.000-07:00

I am still pretty uncomfortable most of the time. I can't find a good position to sit up or lay down without feeling like my liver is going to jump ship! Oh well, I hope it gets better this weekend so I can maybe leave the house for a few minutes.

Would you believe it is raining AGAIN!!! The dogs are about to go absolutely bezerko from lack of exercise and our back yard has turned into Lake Lester.

2006-06-22T18:00:00.000-07:00

Today was blah. I went 12 hours without a painkiller. I thought I was doing good, but turned out no so good to go without for so long b/c then you have to catch back up. Blah, blah, blah. Quite a bit of pain and uncomfortableness today, everything is swollen and fighting for room still.

Could it rain anymore around here? I am sure some sunshine might help heal things a little faster!

2006-06-21T15:26:00.000-07:00

Yesterday and today have been pretty much the same. I have my pain meds spread out to every 5 hours almost every time. I got the go ahead to take Ambien CR at night to help me stay asleep and that has definitely helped out the last 2 nights.

Yesterday, I left the house for the first time. Joel's Mother is in town for a while to give him some help around the house. We all ran an errand to the shoe store, of course, if you are going to try and bribe me to get out of my pj's for something, shoes are always a good choice! We went to DSW, so I also got some of my necessary walking in, so we killed 2 birds with one stone.

Today we had a pointless visit with our surgeon and he is just sending me back to my oncologist and that appointment is for Monday morning. So, I hope he is ready for me and puts me on some kind of chemo plan at the time. Wishful thinking!

2006-06-19T11:14:00.000-07:00

Well, all of this rain certainly does not hurt my participation in the sleep olympics! For the last 2 days, it has been the same shade of dark outside everytime I wake up. I never know if it is day or night. I guess it doesn't really matter right now? I am beginning to be able to spread out my pain doses a little farther. I am having trouble staying asleep lately, I have no choice in the matter of falling asleep! I am having crazy hallucinations and I keep waking myself up from talking in my sleep. Several times I have woken myself up by grasping at things in the air that are not there! Fun stuff! Joel has added these to the regular crazy list, he is not convinced they are drug induced!

I must go now. I am being forced to eat in exchange for more pain killers. What a meanie caregiver!

2006-06-18T10:15:00.000-07:00

I have finally made the long trip downstairs for the first time since we got back home. I have basically been holed up in our bedroom on heavy meds round the clock since Friday evening. The pain is gradually letting up and I am able to stay awake after doses now.

So, the liver surgery was not meant to be just yet! You think I could get a refund on all of our time and effort in preparing for these 2 non-surgeries? This time they gutted me to find out they couldn't do it and I have the most gi-normous incision in a big backward "L" shape all across my belly. Oh well, we have asked all the questions in every angle possible and supposedly, it is better off that they didn't go through with it. I told him he had not seen the last of me and as soon as my trusty chemo kicks these new "nodules" asses, that I would be right back there ready for more cutting!

I can't thank everyone enough for all of the support Joel and I have received. We were flooded with flowers, plants, cookies, emails, prayers... You name it, everyone came through wherever we were in need. It warms my heart that so many people care about us. I hope all this cancer mess is over soon and we can all focus and more positive things for a change!

Lots of Love,
Kelly

2006-06-16T18:33:00.000-07:00

Kelly got out of the hospital today. She is at home and resting. We are both beat after the three night stay at the island. I don't know why no one lets you sleep in those places. A nurse woke me up at 4:30 a.m. to give me some paper work about Kelly's meds. I suppose it couldn't wait.

I will try and blog tomorrow, right now I am too tired.

Joel

2006-06-15T13:56:00.000-07:00

I don't get to blog much. For those of you who know me, sometimes my "southernisms" and words that I think sound good in sentences aren't always correct. Which Kelly does not wish for either of these on her blog. But there are a lot of you who check this everyday and I thought that a little info from me might help ease your minds of the most recent events.

The cancer has spread to Kelly's abdomen. The doctor said there were several small spots. So the big question that I am sure a lot of you have is " why not take out the big tumor"? The reason why not, is b/c the cancer originated in the liver. So it takes on the same characteristics of the liver. If you remove part of the liver the body will automatically tell the liver to grow at a faster rate. Since the cancer has the same characteristics of the liver it grows at the same faster rate. Another problem is that they only saw a few spots, so we don't know if it is anywhere else.

So what's next? We have not spoken with our medical oncologist. But we are sure it will involve more chemo.

How's Kelly? She is in amazing spirits. She is the strongest woman I know and I am lucky to have someone like her. She is ready to continue the fight.

What can I do? Keep on praying and sending email to the room with kind words. Keep on fighting along side of us.

We are all disappointed that the surgery did not happen, but we are going to keep on fighting and will continue to need everyone's help to do so. We aren't done yet.

Until the next time.

Joel

Update from Guest Blogger: Kelley Stephens

2006-06-13T14:55:00.000-07:00

Joel called to say that they were unable to do the surgery today. Once they began the procedure it became evident that the cancer had seeded. Sorry for the brief post, but that's all I have so far. I will be sure to update as soon as I get further information. Keep the prayers and well wishes coming!

Also, if you are on the "schedule," please plan on sticking to your days---Joel thinks Kelly will be in the hospital for three or four days.

2006-06-12T13:36:00.000-07:00

Ready or not, it's here!! Tomorrow is cutting day, hopefully this time they will do some serious chopping! I am about to start my "cleansing" to prepare for tomorrow, I can't wait for the fun to begin.

Surgery time is 7:30, we have to be there at 5:30. Surgery should last 4-6 hours and someone will post the update on the blog as soon as it becomes available. Here is the address for the "Net Notes" that they deliver to my room to cheer me up.

You need my name, birthday (01/30/1975) and my patient # (0666995) to send a message.
Messaging Address: https://www2.mdanderson.org/sapp/contact/message.cfm

Everybody keep their fingers crossed for clear margins and a cancer free Kelly! And say a good word for my perfect husband and our families, everyone is pretty stressed right now. I hope the next post on here is nothing but great news!

I'm signing off for a while so I can grow a brand new healthy liver, chat with ya later!
Love,
Kelly

2006-06-10T20:44:00.000-07:00

I finally caught up on some sleep last night. So much so that I slept until 11:00! We were supposed to be at my company's 15th anniversary company picnic at 11, so we were a little late, oops! It was nice to see everyone from work and their families. We all talk so much about our families but rarely do we get to actually meet them, the family picnic was a great idea.

I hit a wall around 5ish and crashed hard when we got home. I had a fever I couldn't shake and I just felt terrible all over. I slept for an hour and the rest of the evening I spent laying in bed trying to manage my pain. My liver volume is 110%, so I have an extra 10% that is trying to fit into my midsection and it is very uncomfortable! I just came downstairs for the first time in 5 hours and I feel a little better, I hope to get some more rest tonight too. Tuesday will be here before we know it, I am getting very anxious!!

2006-06-08T19:10:00.000-07:00

Just counting down the days until Tuesday! Joel and I are trying to get everything in order to be gone for a week. Thanks to everyone who has volunteered for shift work to sit with me at the hospital to give Joel some free time and volunteers for dog & cat duty at the house, we couldn't get through this without all of your help. I am pretty anxious these days and not sleeping very well, especially since I didn't get my Ambien refilled yesterday! My mind is racing in a million different directions and I can't calm it down at night when I try to go to bed. I am going up to the island tomorrow to demand my Ambien so I can get some rest, I hope it doesn't get ugly! I am not a representative for Ambien, I promise, but the stuff really works well. I have to give credit where credit is due!

Thanks for all of the encouraging comments/emails, I am pretty nervous about this thing. Especially after my luck last time! I am so ready to discard this lousy liver and start fresh with a brand new one!

2006-06-07T18:29:00.000-07:00

Today was a try my patience day at the Isle Of Cancer! Let's just say we waited for a VERY LONG time for our 11:30 appointment and we didn't get home until 4:00!

Okay, now for the good news... My good liver, the left side, has grown a whopping 10% over the last 4 weeks and Dr. Vauthey was very happy with the results of the PVE. Surgery is still on for Tuesday, the 13th. I won't get the time until the night before, how convenient for THEM! Dr. Vauthey gave me the name of the Chief of Anesthesiology and told me to request him for my surgery. Anesthesiology thought this was amusing until they saw my chart from the last time I was under their care and all they put me through. The Chief accepted and I will be in the best hands for my next surgery. No more botched epidurals and extra hospital visits to correct a leaking spinal cord membrane! All is good, now we wait!

2006-06-06T04:40:00.000-07:00

I got my days confused regarding my appointments this week. Yesterday, around 2 I realized that my 5:00 appointments I thought were on Tuesday were really on Monday. So, I spent the evening at the island and I got home around 6:30. And now we are here bright and early at 6:30AM for my CT prep and my favorite Barium Breakfast! This is my only appointment today, so I hope to be home soon. At least I am in the new building with internet access and I can pass the time on the internet.

2006-06-04T18:18:00.000-07:00

I had so much fun on my trip to Miami. We had very nice weather and only one afternoon shower. We spent most of the time on the beach hanging out. Our resort was really nice and we wore out the waitstaff bringing us fruity boat drinks on the beach.(Don't worry, mine were non-alcoholic.) We stayed at the Trump Sonesta Hotel in Sunny Isles, which is about 20 minutes North of South Beach. Kelley's undying charm got us an upgrade to an ocean view which was really nice, we had a private balcony that looked out over the pool and the ocean. We ate some really good food, yes, I even ate well at several meals. We got home around noon today and I just woke up from a 4 hour nap, I hope I can get to sleep tonight.

Thanks so much to Sarah, Kelley and Megan for taking me on for a weekend. I am so lucky to have the best friends in the world, including those that didn't make the trip, of course! I really needed veg time away from the sick house and a beach getaway was just what the doctor ordered, right up there with growing a new liver.

This week is filled with appointments on the make-believe island. Tuesday I have appointments at 5:00 in the evening, which is weird, then Wednesday I have a CAT scan at 6:30 in the morning, followed up with an appt. with my surgeon and anesthesiologist on Thursday. I might as well get a room down in the Med. Center for the week!

2006-05-31T19:53:00.000-07:00

We had a busy Memorial Day weekend. My energy level was way up, so I was able to run around and do a lot. I also ate more over the weekend than I have in the last 3 weeks combined. I still had my fluctuating fevers, but I was able to keep them in check with some Tylenol and napping. I am trying to stockpile my energy from today and tomorrow for my Girls Trip to Miami tomorrow. I am so excited to get out of town for a while with some of my best girl friends. We are going to have a blast, I just hope we don't get kicked out of our fancy pants hotel! My-Jammy here we come!!

2006-05-25T16:48:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was not so good. Today, was MUCH better! I have found that 2 Motrin can do the trick for my pain and I don't have to take the super strong Darvocet and be a walking zombie all day. I am still jacking with these fevers, but I guess that's a good thing. I was able to actually get out of the house today and run some errands. I hope this Motrin fix keeps working!

In case I don't post tomorrow, I hope everyone has a happy and safe Memorial Day Weekend!

2006-05-23T19:59:00.000-07:00

Here's a picture of my babies sunning on the chaise lounge. Are they spoiled or what? I felt a little better today, I had to go to the island for an appt. I had to take a 2 hour nap afterward to recover from my excursion. I have zero energy these days and I am so sick of these pesky fevers! I woke up from my nap with 99.7, which seems to be my magic number lately. I have dipped into the 100's a few times, but I am good at feeling it hit and I try to take my Tylenol immediately to keep it under control. I talked to my Physician's Assistant today and he said the pain, fatigue and low grade fever mean that my liver is growing. So, basically, being miserable is a good thing for me right now b/c it means my body is doing what it is supposed to, but it is taking every bit of reserve it can find to manage.

My surgery is 3 weeks from today, I am at the midway point between the PVE and the surgery. Steve, my P.A. says that he thinks I will feel better in a week or 2. He also clarified the misconception I had regarding my liver shrinking from the PVE. He said that the PVE just cuts off one of the 2 blood supplies to the liver and if anything the right, cancerous side of my liver will swell a little. I was under the impression the sick side would shrink due to the lack of blood and give the good side some room to grow. Turns out the good part is growing away and trying to find some room, that explains why I am so uncomfortable all the time. I cannot sit upright for too long b/c my insides feel like they are pushing up into my diaphragm, which I now know is exactly what is happening. Steve eased my mind about being off chemo for 2 months and I feel better about it. When they go in to cut out my liver, they use my original CAT scan from day one, before the chemo shrunk anything. They do this to try and get the clearest no cancer margins, so I guess all that chemo was not necessarily for my liver tumors, but to achieve a systemic effect to prevent the cancer from spreading elsewhere. The tumor shrinkage was just an added bonus, I guess! I hope I can sleep tonight after my long nap!

2006-05-22T16:30:00.000-07:00

Today, was not so good! I was so weak and feverish, I barely got out of bed all day. I finally got comfortable enough to take a nap late this afternoon and I feel a lot better now. I felt like my organs were at war with each other inside my body, everything hurt! I guess they called a truce for now, b/c everything seems to have calmed down.

2006-05-21T16:50:00.000-07:00

I had lots of ambitious projects to do around the house this weekend that turned into Joel's and my Dad's projects. I started feeling crummy again and I have been battling fevers all weekend. I did good on Friday and held down some decent food, but I have paid for it all weekend. If I attempt to get up and about, I immediately hit bottom and feel kind of dizzy and sweaty. The 100 degree heat and humidity down here doesn't help! So, I have just had to sit back and watch my husband and my Dad do all the hard work around the house. Not too bad of a gig! They got a ton done, they painted our hall bath, installed 4 new light fixtures, moved furniture around and installed a new toilet in our master bath. Our first house is a fixer-upper and we are soooo close to completing most of the big jobs on our list for the interior. Working on all of these projects lately has been a good outlet for us, we really enjoy the pride that comes along with doing it ourselves. We have learned a lot and luckily we live within a mile from The Home Depot! I think our next house will be move-in ready and we can appreciate someone else's hard work for a change! :)

2006-05-19T20:27:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I started to actually feel "normal". No weird liver pains, no uncomfortable squished organ pains. I actually had no issues for about 2 hours last night, it was very weird to feel cancer free for a while. Of course, I jinxed it and I got a fever of 100 and I felt pretty crummy until I fell asleep last night. Low and behold, today I woke up feeling "normal" again, I actually ate some lunch, lots of protein, don't worry. Then I struggled to sit through The DaVinci Code for 2 and 1/2 hours! If you have read the book, you will be disappointed, it was soooo dull! I managed to have an entire "normal" day, and now since I have put it in writing, I am sure something crazy will screw it up tonight! I am hoping to crash before anything has time to go haywire! :)

Joel and I have a bunch of chores to do this weekend in preparation for a visit from my friend Suzanne and her new man over Memorial Day weekend. They are coming in from Berkeley, California and her boyfriend Mark has never been to The Lone Star State, so we have to make sure we give him a good taste of Texas! I am glad they are coming b/c it gives us some motivation to get some of our loose ends tied up around the house, we have a long list to work on!

2006-05-17T19:54:00.000-07:00

I felt kind of crummy this morning so I took an afternoon nap and I felt much better afterward. I ran a couple of errands and I managed to get down a little more food today. Mainly b/c I am running out of Boost and I keep forgetting to restock. My liver is not happy when I eat solid food b/c it has to crank up and start working to help it digest. I get uncomfortably full feeling just by eating a few bites and the food takes forever to digest, so drinking Boost is just a lot easier on me and my sliver of a liver(hee-hee) doesn't have to work so hard on the Boost diet.

I hope everyone Lived Strong today and remembered to cherish every single day and to take nothing for granted. There was a story line on Grey's Anatomy's season finale this past week that really hit home for me. Finn, Chris O'Donnell, the vet was talking about what happened when his wife was in a car wreck and of course died, b/c everyone on that show dies! He said that he stopped making plans when she died, and that has been a big deal to me since this cancer diagnosis. I have had no control over my future, near or far, at 30, that takes a toll on you b/c that's all 30 is about is making plans for a family, a house, vacations, whatever. I couldn't even RSVP for showers or weddings, I couldn't make set plans for anything or give a definite "yes" during that whole chemo phase b/c I never knew how I would be feeling, if my chemo would stay on schedule, etc... Now that I have almost made it to the surgery, I truly hope I get my future back, I think I have earned it. I hope everything goes as planned this time, that I make a speedy recovery and that Joel and I can take our lives back from cancer forever and make good on all of our dreams and plans. People always say it's the "not knowing" that gets you and it is soooo true! I do have firm plans for a Girls Only trip in a couple of weeks to sunny Miami, it is on the books and I am so there! We are going to sit on the beach and relax in the spa, I am so excited and thrilled to have "plans" to look forward to, even if it is just for a weekend, it will seem like a month for me. I just need to make sure they stock the bar with Chocolate Boost before I arrive! :)

2006-05-16T19:33:00.000-07:00

Every day is better, today I actually left the house and took the dogs to the big dog park by my house, it has 2 lakes and several acres all fenced in so they can run free. I lasted an hour, the last half of which I was throwing the frisbee from the park bench, but that still counts! I got a little sun and a little exercise and I managed to eat some soup for dinner. I still prefer Boost, but I am trying to eat more solid food to get my husband and friends off my back. (I know soup is not solid, but it's not Boost, so leave me alone!) I think yesterday was the first day in a week I escaped a fever and I did not wake up in a pool of sweat, that's always good.

Joel and I had to drive all the way down to the island this evening to pick up a prescription, an hour out of our way. They can't man the phones at the pharmacy to get prescriptions switched to a different pharmacy and you can't park anywhere to run up and pick it up. Which takes 15 minutes at most, so then it costs you 7 bucks to have your car valeted (is that a word?). What a rip off! I hate going up there when I am feeling good, it is such a downer. I told Joel that I would have been just fine never knowing where M.D. Anderson was my entire life, but now I know I am a better person for experiencing this and realizing how many people suffer from this horrible thing every day! Tomorrow is Livestrong Day, sponsored by the Lance Armstrong Foundation, you are supposed to wear yellow in support of cancer research and cancer survivors. So, remember to LIVESTRONG tomorrow and be thankful for your health and your friends and family all around you!

Love,
Kelly

2006-05-15T14:41:00.000-07:00

I am feeling much better today. I had another chat with my Physician's Assistant today and he told me not to worry about the fevers as long as they are fluctuating and I do not have acute sickness. So, I am good, besides waking up every night with my pj's soaked in sweat from fighting fevers! I still have zero desire to eat solid food and the hunger trigger is not working in me, so I have to force myself to chug a Boost every so many hours, I just don't realize that I haven't eaten. I feel very antsy today, I am not nearly as weak as I was yesterday. I think everyday I am feeling remarkably better and more energized. When I was on chemo, my brain and my body were both in a fog, so I was too wiped to do anything and my brain was too numb to realize that I wasn't doing anything. Now, my body is wiped and my brain is back to normal, so it is making me crazy that my body can't keep up with my mind! At least I am off the caffeine diet, I thought Joel was going to leave me, I was such a basket-case!

2006-05-14T08:50:00.000-07:00

I finally left my sickhouse on Friday for the first time in a week. I was feeling pretty crummy all last week. I went to watch our company's annual softball tournament at a park near my house, it was nice to see everyone away from work and to soak up a little fresh air and sunshine. I crashed for 2 hours when I got home from my excursion, but it was worth it. I did manage to eat some solid food Friday night, it was only a couple of bites, but it was progress. I have zero appetite and the only thing I am okay with is Chocolate Boost, it is very high in protein, so I know it is helping with the liver regeneration. I just can't seem to shake this fever I have had post-op, I don't have it all day long, mostly in the evenings and right when I am trying to go to bed. The doc said not to worry unless it hits 101, so I have done a good job of avoiding that number b/c the last place I want to be right now is the ER! This liver growing stuff is so tiring, I am wiped out just by going up or down the stairs. It will be over soon and I will be recovering from the big time surgery very soon, actually it is on the books for Tuesday, June 13th. It better happen this time!

2006-05-11T18:58:00.000-07:00

Doc said to get used to the Narcolepsy b/c my liver is regenerating and it is very taxing on my whole body. The liver is "selfish" and will use up anything it can find to meet its regeneration needs. What I want to know is... How does the liver know which direction to grow? My entire liver is still in there and is larger than normal and my spleen is enlarged, it doesn't have very many options. I think right now it has chosen to grow upwards into my diaphragm, I am having a little shortness of breath and I cannot lie flat on my back b/c the pressure restricts my breathing. I feel like that guy on Alien that has that crazy worm thing fly out of his stomach onto the dinner table. I just don't have enough room for all of these organs! Nothing a little dose of Darvocet won't help! On a side note, my bottle of Darvocet, of course prescribed by the pro's at MD Anderson actually has a warning label on it that says "This medicine contains Acetometaphin (Tylenol), exceeding the recommended dose can have serious harmful effects on your liver" I got a good laugh out of that one! It's okay, I have 2 livers right now! :) Off to bed now, I have some liver beauty sleep to catch up on.

2006-05-10T15:35:00.000-07:00

Today has been pretty uneventful. I seem to have a touch of Narcolepsy. I woke up around 9 and laid in bed for an hour, got up and took a shower. I guess that was enough excitement b/c next thing I knew I had fallen asleep for an hour with my towel on my head and everything. Then I went upstairs to take a short intentional nap and I ended up sleeping for 3 more hours. I am back and forth between feverish and chills, I could go back to sleep right now. My body is catching up after all of that caffeine I had to chug last week, plus I never get any rest in the hospital, someone is always poking on you and counting your incisions!

Good Night!

2006-05-09T17:57:00.000-07:00

Portal Vein Embolization down, one liver resection to go! The PVE went well and the doc said "it was a very difficult procedure", which is evident by the 15 poke holes I have in my ribcage. He said it was hard to get to the portal vein from the angle he was aiming from b/c the tumors were in the way. My surgeon does not "allow" the Interventional Radiologists to go in from the opposite side, so he had to get it done from the more difficult angle. Today when I was trying to clean off all the Betadine junk off my stomach/chest area, I kept trying to wipe off these red dots on my side too, turns out they were all holes where they had inserted the guide needle unsuccessfully. They use an ultra sound machine to guide the needle and when they find the right spot, then they go in with the heavy machinery.

The first day/night in the hospital the pain wasn't too bad, when someone is offering you Morphine through an IV, it's kind of hard to say no. I stayed drugged on Morphine for about 12 hours, which is a fast acting drug, so it did not provide me with much more than an hour or 2 of relief at a time. I tried taking oral pain meds that would last longer but I couldn't hold anything down and I just ended up throwing them up. The pain just kind of faded away by this morning and I was up and about with no problems and I managed to hold down some good old Southern grits for breakfast. I crashed when I got home, I think I slept for almost 4 hours, it was soooo nice to be back in my bed. The best thing about the PVE is that it relieved my cancer pains which were crippling me for the last week. I am so happy to be pain free right now, I hope I don't jinx it! Thanks again for everyone's support and words of encouragement. I hope to be back on the island for an extended stay in about 4 weeks, I will let you know when my surgery date is finalized.

2006-05-07T20:25:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is the Portal Vein Embolization at 10:30. Joel will send word when we get out and hopefully someone will guest blog for me. We should be in our room around noon and I am only supposed to spend one night on the island. Thanks for all of your kind words of support.

2006-05-06T19:18:00.000-07:00

I managed to get through today without any painkillers. I didn't get too much sleep last night. Right when I dozed off a big storm hit and woke me up with a ton of thunder and knocked our power out for 5 hours! So it was a balmy 85 degrees in our house this morning, not conducive to sleeping. I am about to hit the pain meds, I toughed it out as long as I could. I think the pain is a little better, my liver has stopped hurting so bad and now all my pain is concentrated in the top of my right shoulder, in between my neck and the top of my arm.

I got a wonderful gift today from my friend, Evangelina, it was from the lavender farm in Cape Cod. It was a lavender soothing eye pack and a lavender and buckwheat filled cozy thingy you can heat up in the microwave. I cannot tell you how perfect the timing was, I heated them both up immediately and actually relaxed enough to take a nap. It helped soooo much, thanks Codders!

2006-05-05T15:29:00.000-07:00

I think the past week's events finally caught up to me today. I planted myself in the surgeon's office this morning b/c I have been in excruciating pain the last 2 days. I have been going crazy worrying it is b/c of a complication from the surgery. They hustled me down for a CAT scan just to make sure nothing was wrong. They have already reviewed the scan results and everything looks fine to them, but getting to this point took a long time! I didn't eat all day and had nothing to drink, except Barium. The CAT scan was a 4 hour ordeal which included a fire alarm and me calling the tech a jerk, which he truly deserved. After 8 hours on the island, I finally escaped in tears and in horrendous pain. I have medicated myself and finally eaten something and I feel much better. So, I am having cancer pain and I am going to suck it up b/c I am lucky enough to have been pain-free for the last 4 months. It just makes this surgery all the more worth while!

We are still on for the PVE on Monday and we will have to spend the night in the pokey again for the 3rd time in 10 days. They just can't get enough of me up there!

2006-05-04T13:32:00.000-07:00

I haven't slept for more than 3 hours at a time since Friday night! My body is soooo exhausted, but my brain has other plans for me! I think I forgot to mention that the "blood patch" process required an insane amount of caffeine delivered through an IV, so for 24 hours in the hospital I received 500 mg of caffeine every 8 hours. So, you can literally have a caffeine IV, good to know!

Part of my responsibility after being discharged is consuming 4-5 caffeinated beverages a day, along with staying "very hydrated" which is an oxymoron b/c caffeine is a diuretic! I have to do this for 5 days, I have been caffeine-free since November and the least bit of it makes me wired. I didn't eat for 7 days, so I lost 15 pounds last week and I had my first meal yesterday at 4:00, so the last thing I want to do is drink all this crazy caffeine, it is really messing with my stomach and my head! Okay, I will quit whining now, I am so freaking tired and crazy hyper at the same time, I think Joel is about ready to ship me off somewhere for the next few days. Also, my cancer pain has returned fast and furious, as soon as I get rid of one thing, along comes the next! It feels like my liver is trying to escape out of my ribcage and I have referred pain in my shoulder and neck! So, I am on pain-killers, sleep meds, and caffeine and I am pretty sure they are all canceling each other out, I am just high on life! Happy Cinco de Mayo manana!

2006-05-03T10:34:00.000-07:00

We're finally home! We got home last night around 7:30 after a little more than 24 hours in the MDACC hospital. Here's the condensed version...

When they did the epidural, in preparation for the big liver resection, that didn't happen, the anesthesiologist thought it would be good fun to give me a rookie understudy to access his first epidural. He was Dr. McDreamy, so I was fine with it, after I had a little happy juice. You can't be completely out for the epidural b/c you have to sit still in an uncomfortable position while they play around in your spinal cord. Dr. McDreamy didn't bring his "A" game for this one, he stabbed around in there at least 8 times (from the puncture wound count on my spine), one time the entire left side of my body seized and my left leg jumped straight up off the table! At this point, I started to get a little worried, he kept hitting my bones, which I could hear and feel each time. I was asking if there was anything I could be doing different to help out, I could feel blood running down my back and the head anesthesiologist finally made him stop and she took over and of course had it in 5 seconds! It was pure torture and the last thing I remember before being completely knocked out for the "big surgery".

After I began to come out of the anesthesia after the not so big surgery, my head, neck, and shoulders felt like they had been fused together and I was wearing cast iron football shoulder pads. I had no movement in my neck and I could only lay flat on my back without a pillow to get somewhat comfortable. I just figured they had me in some crazy position during surgery and I was just sore. Then when I started weaning myself off the pain meds the headache finally became evident. If I sat up, I threw up, that was a given. The name headache or migraine does not do justice to the excruciating pain this monster was inflicting upon me!

Finally, Monday came around and it was time for the PVE, I had felt somewhat normal for a few hours on Sunday so I thought I was good to go. Monday, had different plans for me. I felt worse than the previous 4 days combined and they moved our 11:00am appt. to 2:30 without telling us so we were on the island ready to go at 10:30 stranded, for who knows how long. I couldn't even walk, I was hunched over my barf bucket in the wheelchair trying to avoid the food cart that seemed to be every where we turned! Joel got a hold of the Physician's Assistant and he said he was going to have an Anesthesiologist call us b/c something didn't sound right to him. So we camped out at our good friend Sara's house that is only 5 minutes from the med center so we could get out of there but still be close by, I crashed on the couch. At some point it was decided there was no PVE for me that day, so around 4 I mustered up the strength to try and make it through the horrendous car ride home. The minute we drove into our neighborhood, the anesthesiologist called and all I could hear Joel say was "Oh God", several times. I knew that wasn't good! I had barely made it all the way home without getting sick, so I went in the house, got sick and got back in the car to go back up to the hospital (30 minute drive).

Turns out I had a "Post Dural Spinal Headache", they punctured the membrane surrounding my spinal cord during the epidural and my spinal fluid was leaking out and making me violently ill along with the most ridiculous headache you could ever imagine! So, from the middle of my back up to my brain (your brain floats around in your spinal fluid too)was bone dry in the fluid department and I could hardly move, I was convinced my eyeballs were trying to free themselves from my head! I later learned that the lack of fluid causes the optic nerves to literally "pull" on your eyeballs from inside! I can barely type it without cringing in pain! The remedy for this fun stuff is called a Blood Patch. They make you hunch over again in that awful position and draw 2 syringes of blood from your arm, almost from my foot b/c I was so dehydrated, then they go a few spaces higher from your "leak" and do another epidural access but this time they inject your blood into the space in hopes that it will pool around the hole and the blood will clot and seal the hole. This is no fun and 5 times worse than the actual botched epidural itself! They made Joel leave the room b/c they have so many people faint on them from watching! I immediately felt the headache leave my body, it was a freaking miracle! I had to lie flat on my back for 45 minutes, which I went ahead and did for almost 2 hours! If the first blood patch is unsuccessful (95%), then a second one is done with about a 99% success rate. I was praying hard that there was not another blood patch in my near future!

So, I hope I caught everyone up on my lovely week! I am home and I am feeling like a new person. My Portal Vein Embolization is scheduled for Monday morning at 10:30, and the "big surgery" should follow in a month, keep your fingers crossed for us! Thanks for everyone's support and prayers! We will keep on trucking!

Guest Blogger: Kelley Stephens

2006-05-02T11:23:00.000-07:00

Kelly and Joel are doing much better today. After a rough couple of days
which included a horrendous spinal headache, Kelly is on the mend! In order
to alleviate the headache, they did a blood patch procedure this morning.
Basically, they inject blood near the spinal cord membrane puncture to plug
the site. Think: fix-a-flat. I spoke to Kelly following the procedure and
she sounded great. No word yet on when she�ll get off the Island.

As a result of this newest development, Kelly did not have the PVE (Portal
Vein Embolism) but will likely have that procedure within the next week.

Continued thanks for all your thoughts and prayers!

2006-04-30T13:16:00.000-07:00

Hello all, I have returned from the dark side of anesthesia. I have finally been freed from my hallucinations and imaginary friends. I was so bummed to hear the news, but it is for the best and the surgeon seems to think that a little more time off from chemo and the PVE will definitely get me ready for the big deal. He said he could have gone through with it, but it was in my best interest to have a healthy liver to fall back on, I agree. I was just so exhausted preparing for the surgery with only 6 days to get everything in order. I needed to catch up on my beauty sleep. I finally stopped throwing up and I held down some Gatorade and a Boost today, and I have done a complete 180, I took a much needed shower and I have finally moved from the bed to the couch downstairs and the sunshine is doing me some good. I can't believe they are doing the PVE tomorrow and I will spend another miserable night in the hospital! I had one nurse who thought it was fun to count my incisions every 30 minutes during her rounds, I finally told her there were 5 and she shouldn't worry anymore about them mysteriously escaping her during the night! She was a wacko! It was in the nurses best interest to keep me drugged b/c I was about to brawl with the next one that came at me while I was semi-lucid! Thanks for all of your kind words of support and I loved reading the Net Notes in between pain meds! Thanks to all my girlfriends that came up to help me throw up all over them, I am sure my next nickname will be Exorcist Girl!

More fun stuff tomorrow, we'll try and keep everyone up to date, I think the PVE is scheduled for 11:00?

2006-04-28T13:15:00.000-07:00

Kelly is fine. Disappointed ,but fine. The doctor went in first to look around via laproscopy and during this process he found that the left lobe of Kelly's liver ( the good one ) was unhealthy. The left lobe has been through alot including 6 rounds of chemo not to mention pulling the slack for the right side of the liver. The doctors will help the left side regain strength by performing a PVE ( portal vein embolization) this is a procedure that shuts the supply of blood of to the right lobe of the liver providing the left lobe with more blood. This will make the left lobe regenerate and become healthy. The doctors are very positive that with this procedure and sometime off chemo that they will be able to reschedule the surgery in about 3 to 4 weeks.

Kelly is having some problems getting over being put under ,but I will let her tell ya'll about that.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all the prayers, email, cards and flowers that all our friends and family have sent. We can not do this with out ya'll.

Joel

2006-04-26T18:45:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is the big day! I am currently doing my "prep" work for my surgery, won't get into too much detail there, but it is no fun!

We check in at 5:45 tomorrow morning and the surgery is scheduled to start at 7:30. I will be at M.D. Anderson Alkek Hospital. The surgery lasts 4-6 hours and I may be in ICU for a while during recovery until I get a room. I hope it has an ocean view! Someone will post all the other details as they become available. I am including a web address where you can send email messages to me and the volunteers will print them and bring them to my room. Sounds like a genius idea, I guess that means I don't have internet connection in my room? I have been told to expect to be in the hospital for 7-9 days, I am banking on 7, who gets any rest in a hospital anyway??

I can't wait to post cancer free very soon! I know all of your prayers and overwhelming support has made this possible for me, keep up the good work! This will be a long recovery, but it will be sooooo worth it.

Thanks & Much Love,
Kelly

Oh, you need my name, birthday (01/30/1975) and my patient # (0666995) to send a message.
Messaging Address: https://www2.mdanderson.org/sapp/contact/message.cfm

2006-04-25T18:27:00.000-07:00

Well, surgery day is fast approaching! I am so psyched to finally get to this stage! I have posted a picture of the liver b/c a lot of people have asked me where it is, what part is being resected, etc... So, I thought I would write a brief educational lesson about my surgery. Since I am having an "extended" right lobectomy they are taking a little more than half of my liver. In the picture, the "right" side is actually my right side, which in the picture it appears on the left. Basically they are cutting out everything to the "left" of that main artery that divides the liver into two lobes. I know I am boring you, just humor me! :)

Thanks for all of the prayers and support lately, we are a little nervous about such an extensive surgery. But we know everything will be great after a few months of recovery. I have included a very informative link about cholangiocarcinoma, the pictures are interactive so you can see exactly where they are cutting the tumors out. http://gastro.nts.jhu.edu/therapy_bile.cfm

I will post one last blog tomorrow before I hand over the reins to my husband and friends for a while. I will try and give the specifics as I get them, they won't give me an exact time until 3-5 tomorrow. I will post a link where you can leave email messages to us in the hospital and the volunteers will print them out and deliver them to me in my room. I will need some outside interaction while spending 7 days in the hospital! We will do our best with updates, please take it easy on Joel's cell phone for a while, he will need his rest too. I feel like we are both having surgery Thursday, he is more nervous than I am.

2006-04-23T19:40:00.000-07:00

This is a picture of my most dear friends, we were all actually in the same spot for once, so this one is very precious to me. From left to right, Britt, Sarah, me, Kelley, Suzanne, Evangelina, and Sara. I am so grateful for each and every one of them and for all of those not in this particular picture. Sara gets the most credit, she has been putting up with me since 6th grade, I can't believe we have shared more than half of our lives together! The rest of my clan was formed in high school, all girls and Catholic, we managed to keep it very interesting! We have all kept in touch since high school and we are all very close, I am so lucky to be a part of such a wonderful group of "young" ladies! We all got together for this picture back in December, I think, right after my cancer diagnosis. Not the best picture b/c I think we all shed a tear or two during lunch. I couldn't have made it this far without this amazing group of gals, I hope to post a cancer-free picture of all of us very soon! I love you guys, and watch out b/c I will be back in full form very soon!

2006-04-21T14:10:00.000-07:00

Well, they are not wasting any time getting me on the cutting board! I am scheduled first thing Thursday morning! I know, shocker, huh? We had no idea it would be so soon, less than a week away. He had a cancellation and I got first dibbs on the opening, so we are in a little bit of a panic as far as making arrangements to be in the hospital for 7-9 days. But we are all very excited, scared and anxious all at the same time! The surgeon is going to do a little laparascopic exploration to take a look at the left lobe of my liver and make sure there are no tumors that the CAT scan did not pick up. He said there is less than a 5% chance there might be something there, but he wanted to rule it out before he did the big incision b/c then I would be recuperating from a wasted procedure. The procedure I am having done is an "extended right lobectomy", he is removing the entire right lobe of my liver. The left lobe of my liver appears to be tumor free and is already regenerating itself as a result of the dead tissue in my right lobe, so I already have a head start. And lucky for me, this cancer picked the one organ in the body that regenerates itself, so in no time, I will have a full liver again! Thanks for all of the support, it is going to be crazy for the next few days and I will make sure to find someone versed in blogging to fill my shoes while I am on blog vacation, so we can keep everyone up to date. If you are in Houston and want to stop in and visit, we will post the specifics later. The surgery takes 4-6 hours, so I don't imagine we will be up for visitors until Friday or the weekend.

2006-04-20T15:18:00.000-07:00

Drumroll please....
Great news!!! My scans show 40% decrease in a small tumor separate from the big tumor and about 20% shrinkage in the big tumor, and my tumor markers are down from 230 to 150. My oncologist said he has been in contact with my surgeon and he is almost positive that tomorrow the surgeon will tell me his ready to cut this crap out of me! I am so pumped and I could not have asked for better news. Thanks to everyone for all of your support. Thanks to my perfect husband, my wonderful family, the best friends in the whole world, my coworkers donating their sick/vacation time to me to cover my hours missed at work, Joel's coworkers for being so supportive about the work he has had to miss because of me, all of my blog friends that send me the kindest notes and words of encouragement, and all of my fellow cholangio friends who are all fighting the fight along with me! I am so grateful for everything, I could never have made it this far without my extensive support group! Hooray for shrinkage and surgery!!!

2006-04-19T20:13:00.000-07:00

Today went as well as any day could go when you start off with a barium breakfast and a barium enema both before 10:00 in the morning. They were miraculously on time today. My appointments were at the new building where everything is nicer and runs so much smoother, the main building is like being stuck in the 70's and the new building is futuristic compared to the main building. I did stick with the berry flavor today, I was tempted by another patient to try the banana, but I had to stick with what I knew. I do have a funny from today, the nurse that went over all of the questions they ask before you begin the prep, asked me what flavor barium I wanted and I told her berry and immediately after that she asked me if I was "aware" of the fact that I was having an enema today. I told her yes, it was going to be the highlight of my day, then I asked her if I could pick a flavor for the enema too, she almost fell for it and then she realized what I had said, we had a good laugh. It's really hard to make some of those nurses laugh sometimes but I guess she couldn't resist my tacky humor!

I was so tired from today's activities, I took a nap this afternoon and I guess I was a little more tired than I expected b/c I slept for 4 hours. Yes, that is why I am up so late blogging. The pictures from today are from the Garvan Gardens we visited in Hot Springs, everything was in full bloom. I sneezed the entire time, even through my allergy meds, but it was worth it, the weather was beautiful!

Tomorrow is part one of the surgery saga, so I am banking on reporting some great news tomorrow and even better news from part two on Friday. Thanks for the comments, keep 'em coming!

2006-04-18T18:40:00.000-07:00

I have posted some pics from our travels to Hot Springs and Sheridan, Arkansas. We had a great time visiting with Joel's parents and his sister, Belyn, her husband, Robbie and their two girls, Audrey and Corinne. It was my first trip to Arkansas and I really fell in love with the landscape, everywhere we traveled was beautiful and I loved Bath House Row in Hot Springs. We stayed in the carriage house of an old home(that is now a Bed & Breakfast) that was built in 1890 and was the first home in Hot Springs to get electricity way back when. In Sheridan with the family, we went crawfishin' under a bridge off the side of the road, which I must say was a first for me. And we went to an all you can eat catfish buffet where they serve the catfish fresh from the ponds on sight, it was the best catfish I have ever eaten. We did the Easter egg hunt on Saturday and the girls had a good time hunting for eggs, while the adults had fun hunting for money filled eggs!

Gotta run, I need a good night's sleep so I can chug down my Berry Barium Breakfast bright and early at 7:30AM! With my CAT scheduled for 9:00AM, I hope to be off the island at least by lunchtime! My MRI was on time today, only b/c I checked in for it an hour earlier than I was scheduled, so that means they were really running about an hour behind. Hopefully, I will have internet access in the waiting room like I did today, that really helps pass the time! Thanks so much for all the comments, I LOVED THEM ALL, I truly get pumped up reading everyone's kind words! I have the best support group, I am so lucky, I couldn't do this without all of you out there supporting me and praying for me.

2006-04-17T18:34:00.000-07:00

I hope everyone had a good Easter weekend. Joel and I had a great time in sunny Arkansas, the weather was beautiful. I will try and post some pictures tomorrow.

Schedule this week:
Tuesday--11:00 Blood draw, 12:00 Chest X-ray, 1:00 MRI
Wednesday--7:30 Cat Scan Prep(Barium Breakfast), 9:00 Cat Scan
Thursday--11:30 Dr. Brown, Oncologist to receive results from CAT
Friday--9:30 Dr. Vauthey, Surgical Oncologist to tell me when he is going to cut this cancer out of me--BIG MONEY, NO WHAMMIES!!!

Of course these appointment times are a figment of someone's warped imagination over on the island. Everyone keep their fingers crossed for good news this week.

I am calling for a Comment Contest. I can see that 80-100 people from all over the world are reading my blog on a daily basis, but I don't seem to be hearing from many people lately. I could use some words of encouragement this week, so don't be afraid to hit that little comment button and drop me a line! I really enjoy hearing feedback from the blog, right now Brittney and The Hinkleys have racked up the most points to date. Thanks to everyone for all of the continued support, I am sure all of this cancer talk has to be getting boring by now!! I know I am ready to finish this chemo chapter and move on to the surgery chapter!

2006-04-12T10:50:00.000-07:00

I was able to take Abby & Pearl to play at the park today, they are wiped out! We wanted to make sure they were good and tired before we dropped them off at Kathy's for the weekend. I hope they behave for you Kathy, and thanks again for your help!

Still trucking right along, counting the days until my next scan! Food is still not agreeing with me too well, but it is getting better. Joel and I leave for Arkansas tomorrow to spend Easter with his family. We are going up one day early so we can have a little R&R in Hot Springs, then we head down to Sheridan Friday morning. We haven't seen his parents since Christmas and it has been much longer than that since we have seen his sister and her family. We are very excited to spend some time with them in their new home.

I will be on blog vacation through Sunday. I hope everyone has a good and safe holiday weekend.

2006-04-09T21:05:00.000-07:00

This weekend was pretty good. The weather was perfect, I even got a little chilly. My appetite is increasing and my energy is starting to pick up again. I did have an "I'm gonna hurl" moment in Quizno's on Saturday, I thought a sandwich from there sounded good, but something smelled awful in there. For some reason, I stuck it out and still got a sandwich and I managed to keep it down. I don't know why I still ordered and ate a sandwich from there when the smell in the place almost knocked me over?? We'll just blame it on the chemobrain! My funky side effects with the tingly fingers and toes and overall aversion to all things cold are still lingering. Unfortunately, I am noticing they hang around a little longer each time. Maybe this will be the last time I ever see them?? My doc likes to use the terms "cautious optimism" and "overly optimistic" when I get anxious about cancer issues. If he heard me saying this was my last chemo, he would definitely bring me back down to Earth with one of those terms. That's his job, I guess. It is extremely likely that even if(when)I have the surgery, I will still have to re-visit chemoland again. But hopefully, for just a short visit next time!

2006-04-07T19:57:00.000-07:00

Today was the complete opposite of yesterday. This chemo stuff is so unpredictable! I woke up feeling good and I got a little lunch down. I had some energy, so I strolled around Foley's for a little while, it was too hot to stroll around outside today. Dinner didn't go over so well, I ate a roll and that is all I could handle. I am so glad to put yesterday behind me and wake up to a good day, I hope it lasts through the weekend!

2006-04-06T20:07:00.000-07:00

Today was awful and I would like to forget it real soon! Definitely a horizontal day, I can't remember feeling this crummy in a long time. I still feel sick and food is my enemy right now. I woke up sick at my stomach around 8 this morning, fell back asleep and woke up again around 9:30, sick again. I went downstairs to try and eat to take my medicine but that didn't work out too well for me. I took a Phenergan(anti-nausea) and crashed until about 4 this afternoon. I still felt sick when I woke up and I am struggling to hold down a few graham crackers to take my chemo with. Fourth day into it, I hope the worst is over soon!

Joel and I have modified the Aggie version of the Longhorn Texas Fight song, to express our feelings toward cancer today. Just replace "Texas" with "Cancer". No offense to my Longhorn friends out there! Sorry, this song is PG-13. It is very fitting for the day I had today.

Cancer bites, Cancer bites, Cancer can jump up and bite my a*#!
C-A-N-C-E-R-B-I-T-E-S, Cancer can bite my a*#!!

I will save our chemo cheer for another "special" day. Yes, I am delirious, don't worry, I am sure I have meds for that too! :)

2006-04-05T19:13:00.000-07:00

I got my necessary 12 hours of sleep last night. I was still pretty wiped today, I started feeling nauseous around 7ish so I took an anti-nausea pill and it seems to be helping. Still not interested in food yet, I had a half of a bagel and about 5 strawberries today, I hope I can hold something down to take my evening dose of chemo with. My stomach seems to be revolting against the chemo! My teeth and jaws have been hurting too, which is a new issue. I will have to do some research and see if this is a common side effect of my type of chemo. I think our dryer just blew up, it smells like burnt plastic and there is some smoke coming out of it, gotta run!

2006-04-04T18:45:00.000-07:00

2006-04-04T18:35:00.000-07:00

Well, chemo went well yesterday besides getting a late start. My appointment was for 9:30 and I didn't get called back until after 11:30. Which only happened b/c I had a few choice words with the 14 year old desk clerk. Apparently, they only had part of the labs back from my bloodwork taken earlier that morning, so they were waiting around and not telling me the problem. Well, the bloodwork I had run on Thursday is what cleared me for the chemo and my doc had already written the orders and given me the all clear for chemo. The bloodwork from Monday morning was specifically for tumor markers, that is why they only had "part" of my labs b/c that's all that was taken that day. Anyway, it's so annoying to have to stay on top of everyone all the time to get stuff done at any hospital!

Enough complaining, as you can see from my pictures, we finally scored chemo in the new building where the new breast cancer wing is. I had to go out in style after what was hopefully my last round of chemo! The room was more than double the size of the other rooms, the bed was also twice the size of the little stretchers in the other building and it was so soft and comfy, there were 2 chairs and an armoire with a TV, DVD and VHS player in it. They even had a library of DVD/VHS movies that you could rent for free while you are taking chemo. There were 2 bedside tables and a nice decorative sink and vanity, there was even a little coat closet. Joel and I couldn't believe we had missed out on the good stuff this whole time. You have to "know somebody" to get switched to the ACB building, I finally got the hookup!

Last night I played the fever game all night, I was determined to manage in the comfort of my own home and not in the ER! When I checked in for chemo, my temp was 97.8, which is my normal, I rarely hit 98. When we got home, I could feel it setting in, I hovered in the low 98's for a while, then I got up into the 99's right when I was headed to bed. I had become so weak, Joel had to follow me up the stairs b/c I could hardly get one foot in front of the other. I hit the bed around 8ish and took my Tylenol and then I spent the next 6 hours trying to get my fever down with more Tylenol and cold washrags, blankets on and off, yadda, yadda, yadda... Finally around 2ish I took an Ambien b/c I was so exhausted and I couldn't get comfortable enough to sleep. That worked for about 6 hours and then I was wide awake when Joel got up for work and I am still awake, I think this is a chemo first. I don't know how I am still standing, I have had a long day! But I still feel good, not much of an appetite, I had a half of a bagel this morning and a couple of pieces of roasted turkey for dinner, how exciting! I did manage to get some enchiladas down last night at Chuy's and a bunch of that creamy jalepeno sauce love!

2006-04-02T17:37:00.000-07:00

Joel and I had a pretty busy weekend. I had a ton of energy, so I was on the go! We did a bunch of fixer upper projects around the house, I am finally wiped out, but in an accomplished, good way. I am so happy to have an extra hour of daylight now. The pups are happy too b/c that means longer days to play and more trips to the park during the week.

Tomorrow is chemo #6, big day! My goal is to not end up in the ER this time. My oncologist suggested I take Tylenol just before my infusion to ward off any crazy fevers, so I have added it to my chemo bag of tricks and we will see if it works tomorrow. My MD Anderson schedule is packed for April, I just checked it online and I am booked for 10 appointments between tomorrow and the 21st! I have my second CAT scan progress check scheduled for the 19th, I get my results the following day and the 21st I meet with my SURGICAL ONCOLOGIST, finally!!!! I am banking on a smooth sailing chemo #6, more good shrinkage news and then moving on into the surgical phase. Keep your fingers crossed for me!

2006-03-30T16:19:00.000-08:00

My tri-weekly checkup went well today. The doc said he was so happy with how well I have tolerated the chemo and that I am on a "rough regimen". He said I looked great(well duh?) and to keep up the good work. All of my bloodwork looks great, he said my bloodwork was probably better than his and Joel's! Not too shabby! He also said he was very excited to get to the end of the 6th cycle and re-run the CT and see the results and he is very encouraged by the fact that the surgeon asked to meet with me after he presented my results at the last tumor board meeting. So, happy day at the island!

Monday is chemo day, so I am going to live it up this weekend. I am finally feeling 100% again and I have a lot of energy, so I have to expend it all before I get zapped again! This cancer is going to realize it picked the wrong chick to mess with when I get done with it!! I am off to a sushi dinner tonight, I think it has been an entire month since the last time I was well enough to eat it. So I am way past due!

2006-03-29T19:06:00.000-08:00

I am having good cancer days now. Just trying to build myself up for Monday. Tomorrow should be uneventful at the island, just need to get good bloodwork back so I can do chemo.

2006-03-28T19:03:00.000-08:00

I am feeling much better these days. My energy level is returning and I am able to get out of the house and run errands before my next round of marinade on Monday. We see my oncologist on Thursday to get the all clear and have the orders written for Monday's chemo.

I have really begun to dread the blood draw these days. I have never had issues with needles and IV's, I used to get 3 allergy shots a week when I was only 11 or 12 years old. But since this whole cancer thing, I really feel like they have taken more than their fair share of my blood. It messes with your head when you go at least every 3 weeks for 3 months and watch them fill up all those bottles each time. And the actual blood draw center at the Island is like a cattle ranch. There are always at least 50-60 people overflowing into the hall waiting for their names to be called. Then they call about 10-15 people at a time to line up at the door, then as you make your way down and around 3 hallways they just fill up each room along the way. Within each room there are about 5-6 people waiting their turn so you have to watch every body else's blood being taken. That freaks me out more than watching my own being taken. It does run very smoothly but you definitely feel like you are being "herded" through the system. I shouldn't complain b/c that is probably the only part of the hospital that you don't have to wait for hours to get called back!

2006-03-26T18:44:00.000-08:00

I think I am almost over this sinus mess. My head is still congested and you can hear it in my voice, but the coughing is almost all gone. I hope to shake it completely before my next chemo, a week from Monday. It was hard to limit my exposure to the elements this weekend b/c the weather was so beautiful!

One of Joel's friends at work has offered to dog-sit our 2 labs while we are visiting Joel's family in Arkansas over the Easter holiday. Thanks Kathy! So we took the pups over to Kathy's today to introduce them to her family. Her 3 kids had a blast playing with them and Abby & Pearl both behaved very nicely. They were worn out after we left and they slept in the car the whole way home. Today's activities should keep them worn out for at least a couple of days!

2006-03-25T11:08:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I was feeling pretty good. My friend Sherry and I grabbed a quick lunch and she treated me to a hot stone pedicure, my feet have never been so happy! I had a nice chat with my bossman at work,(He likes to be called a co-worker, but I am pretty sure my co-workers don't sign my paychecks!) I can't begin to explain how wonderful they have been to me during this whole ordeal! I am so lucky to have found such a wonderful extended family!

For dinner, Britt, Sarah, Joel and I had our Lenten seafood dinner and met up with some friends to celebrate Alina's 31st Birthday. Every year we all wear themed T-shirts, I don't remember how we started this but it has become a tradition. So I was sporting my "Cancer Sucks" T-shirt this year, that my friend Suzanne sent me. I almost convinced Joel to wear his, but I let him off the hook, only the girls participate in the T-shirt tradition. I petered out pretty fast and it turned out that the seafood dinner was a little too ambitious for me and I paid the price last night.

I feel much better today and the weather is gorgeous, I hope to soak up some of this sunshine today, of course I will need a gas mask to protect me from the great outdoors! I am sure Joel and I can rig some kind of contraption! I am so pumped to finally get off the couch for 2 days in a row. These last 2 weeks have been miserable, I was getting stir crazy stuck in the house sick the whole time. The one thing I have learned with this chemo experiment is you have to get going like crazy when you feel like it, b/c the next day you may not feel well enough to get out of bed!

2006-03-23T17:29:00.000-08:00

Today was actually a lot better than yesterday. I was up all night with stomach issues, but today the nagging cough has let up. I was able to eat a light lunch, then I had to take one of my 12 hour anti-nausea pills b/c I was having a hard time holding it down. But that kicked in fast and I was able to eat a little dinner too. Much improvement from yesterday!

2006-03-22T19:17:00.000-08:00

Still coughing up a storm. I need a Robitussin I.V., every 4 hours like clockwork I start coughing, just in time for the next dose. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired! Now the second antibiotic is wreaking havoc on my poor stomach, I am still not too keen on eating much these days. I am sure Gatorade is in my near future, gotta love those electrolytes!

I was so cold today in the house, I thought I was feverish again. Then I finally checked the thermostat, and it was 66 degrees in here! No fever, just bone chilling cold in here! So, I cranked up the heater in the middle of March! Crazy Houston weather!

2006-03-21T13:04:00.000-08:00

I thought I was feeling better... Every time I put it in writing, I jinx myself! For some reason I don't feel very good today at all and my cough has returned fast and furious! Of course, yesterday was my last day on the super duper antibiotic, so I am definitely going to hit the Z-Pack today and see if 7 more days won't knock it out. This crazy cold snap we are experiencing can't be helping me, it's supposed to get down into the 30's in a couple of days!

2006-03-19T18:40:00.000-08:00

I think this sinus mess is on its way out. I have been trying to stay inside my bubble and not expose myself to the great outdoors. I have a couple more days of anti-biotics from the ER, then I start my backup round with a Z-Pack just for a little insurance. I was able to run a couple of errands today, my good friend Sarah came out to the West side and toted me around a couple of places, thanks Sarah! I actually moved past my crackers and bagels diet and ate a mini-meal. The pain I was having the week before chemo has disappeared, so I am pumped about that. I am still sleeping like a champ, I hope all this sleep is helping kill cancer! Two weeks until chemo #6, then 3 weeks after that we will re-run the CT-Scan and check my progress. Everyone keep your fingers crossed for a good report!

2006-03-18T13:20:00.000-08:00

I basically slept through St. Patrick's Day 2006, I did wear green pajamas all day! I am still under the weather with this upper respiratory infection. I feel like my head is full of helium and has detached from my body. I am not eating much which does not help with my energy level, but I did leave the house for the first time today in 5 days. So, I am making some headway. I hope my waking hours will outnumber my sleeping hours pretty soon. Joel is with his friends watching all the NCAA basketball stuff, he needed to get out of the sick house for a while. The Aggies play at 4:40, Gig Em Aggies!

2006-03-16T15:22:00.000-08:00

Greetings from Narcolepsy Land! I cannot believe how much I have been sleeping the last few days. I am so beat down with this sinus mess and the cough syrups, oh and the chemo is not helping me fight this at all. I will just have to stay in my bubble and not expose myself to the great outdoors where every tree, flower, mold, grass and ragweed is blooming. Did I mention I love Spring? Just kidding, it is all very pretty to look at, but no fun to breathe in. I have another doctor's appointment at 10:00am tomorrow, so I will definitely have to hit the hay early to make such an early appointment time! :)